A disturbing trend in the world of "disordered eating"

Okay, I've been looking at some blogs of other people who are struggling with destructive eating habits recently and I'm seeing a disturbing trend. It's not a new trend, but now that I'm going through this In His Image program, I'm really seeing it. I have read many, times that eating disorders are diseases or mental illnesses. I don't want to sound mean, but...that's wrong and as long as people think this way, they are never going to get better. Okay, they might stop the behavior through therapy programs, but at the end of the day they are no better off. Cancer is a disease. Schizophrenia is a mental illness. Disordered eating is a sin. It's a form of bondage. That doesn't make it any less destructive that cancer or schizophrenia, it just changes the treatment. It involves taking responsibility for how one has treated one's body.

I know I read somewhere that this person felt like their eating disorder (I'm really beginning to hate the phrase) was a part of them and that they didn't go a second without thinking about it. Been there. I know how that feels, but I'm also learning that that doesn't have to be it...getting better isn't just about stopping a behavior. It's changing your outlook and your attitude towards yourself and about the reason you are here (renewing your mind). And that reason is to glorify God in everything. Now...I'm want this to sound like I've got it down or that I'm walking in total and utter freedom, because I'm not. To pretend like I am would be absolutely idiotic, but I know what works. I wish I could communicate that to other people who have fallen into destructive eating habits.

Create in me a clean heart, O God, And renew a steadfast spirit within me. Psalm 51:10

Fools, because of their transgression,
And because of their iniquities, were afflicted.
Their soul abhorred all manner of food,
And they drew near to the gates of death.
Then they cried out to the LORD in their trouble,
And He saved them out of their distresses.
He sent His word and healed them,
And delivered them from their destructions.
Oh, that men would give thanks to the LORD for His goodness,
And for His wonderful works to the children of men!
Let them sacrifice the sacrifices of thanksgiving,
And declare His works with rejoicing
Psalm 107:17-22

I just wanted to congradulate myself on having 100 people look at my blog...even though they have been the same two people. I appreciate your support :) lol good night

Those who say "AHA!"

Psalm 40
I WAITED patiently for the LORD;
And He inclined to me,
And heard my cry.
He also brought me up out of a horrible pit,
Out of the miry clay,
And set my feet upon a rock,
And established my steps.
He has put a new song in my mouth--
Praise to our God;
Many will see it and fear,
And will trust in the LORD.
Blessed is that man who makes the LORD his trust,
And does not respect the proud, nor such as turn aside to lies.
Many, O LORD my God, are Your wonderful works
Which You have done;
And Your thoughts toward us
Cannot be recounted to You in order;
If I would declare and speak of them,
They are more than can be numbered.
Sacrifice and offering You did not desire;
My ears You have opened.
Burnt offering and sin offering You did not require.
Then I said, "Behold, I come;
In the scroll of the book it is written of me.
I delight to do Your will, O my God,
And Your law is within my heart."
I have proclaimed the good news of righteousness
In the great assembly;
Indeed, I do not restrain my lips,
O LORD, You Yourself know.
I have not hidden Your righteousness within my heart;
I have declared Your faithfulness and Your salvation;
I have not concealed Your lovingkindness and Your truth
From the great assembly.
Do not withhold Your tender mercies from me, O LORD;
Let Your lovingkindness and Your truth continually preserve me.
For innumerable evils have surrounded me;
My iniquities have overtaken me, so that I am not able to look up;
They are more than the hairs of my head;
Therefore my heart fails me.
Be pleased, O LORD, to deliver me;
O LORD, make haste to help me!
Let them be ashamed and brought to mutual confusion
Who seek to destroy my life;
Let them be driven backward and brought to dishonor
Who wish me evil
Let them be confounded because of their shame,
Who say to me, "Aha, aha!"
Let all those who seek You rejoice and be glad in You;
Let such as love Your salvation say continually,
"The LORD be magnified!"
But I am poor and needy;
Yet the LORD thinks upon me.
You are my help and my deliverer;
Do not delay, O my God.

David likes to talk about the people who were trying to kill him all the time. I've read verses similar to these (13-15) many times and have always thought, "I've never really had people wish me evil. People have hurt me, but they have never gone after my life like Saul did with David." I didn't see how it applied to me. Then it all started to make sense...sort of. These people may not be "people" at all. Those who "seek to destroy my life" may be the workers of Satan who come to spread lies and tear down our walk with God. I know it sounds weird, but I think I might be on to something.

Work out what God works in

This is what I read today in My Utmost for His Highest...it was pretty awesome

WORK OUT WHAT GOD WORKS IN

"Work out your own salvation." Philippians 2:12-13

Your will agrees with God, but in your flesh there is a disposition which renders you powerless to do what you know you ought to do. When the Lord is presented to the conscience, the first thing conscience does is to rouse the will, and the will always agrees with God. You say - "But I do not know whether my will is in agreement with God." Look to Jesus and you will find that your will and your conscience are in agreement with Him every time. The thing in you which makes you say "I shan't" is something less profound than your will; it is perversity, or obstinacy, and they are never in agreement with God. The profound thing in man is his will, not sin. Will is the essential element in God's creation of man: sin is a perverse disposition which entered into man. In a regenerated man the source of will is almighty. "For it is God which worketh in you both to will and to do of His good pleasure." You have to work out with concentration and care what God works in; not work your own salvation, but work it out, while you base resolutely in unshaken faith on the complete and perfect Redemption of the Lord. As you do this, you do not bring an opposed will to God's will, God's will is your will, and your natural choices are along the line of God's will, and the life is as natural as breathing. God is the source of your will, therefore you are able to work out His will. Obstinacy is an unintelligent 'wadge' that refuses to be enlightened; the only thing is for it to be blown up with dynamite, and the dynamite is obedience to the Holy Spirit.
Do I believe that Almighty God is the source of my will? God not only expects me to do His will, but He is in me to do it.

New Jeans

Well....all my jeans were getting tight, so I couldn't put it off anymore....I had to go get bigger jeans. I'm up to 1's now :O It wasn't like I was ecstatic about it, but I know it's a good thing. The way I looked at it that helped me was having to get new jeans means I'm putting on weight, putting on weight means I'm getting better, getting better means I'm healing and healing means my walk with God is continuing to strengthen...and that is the good thing.

A quick bounce back

Yesterday was a good day. It was fun, refreshing, encouraging and challenging. After church and a game of racket ball and bunch of friends came over for the afternoon. When I got home from racket ball I went ahead and made lunch. After I ate I realized that the numbers didn't add up and that they were higher than what I expected. I was very annoyed. I went to mom and was like "you didn't do this right". We fixed it, but I was still messed up mentally. That hasn't' happened for a while, but it creeped up and after being in a mood for a while mom strongly suggested that I take some time and pray. After grousing for a couple more minutes I took her advice and the recovery time was unbelievable. I sat down, prayed and started refocusing back on God and within 10 minutes I was back to a normal functioning level. It was all good. He is so merciful.

Psalm 25

Coming Back to Life

That's sort of how I feel. It's kind of like I've been sick and in bed for a long time and I'm finally starting to wake up. I know it sounds weird, but it's how I've felt lately. I can feel my strength coming back physically, emotionally and spiritually. There are still the lagging symptoms that start to act up now and then. Shreds of sin that still have to be taken out, but I'm coming back to myself again. I think one of the things this whole situation has taught me is my need for God. I've always known that I need Him, but once I began to see how filthy and dirty I really was on the inside I really began to understand how much I need Him and how much of me still has to be remade.

There have been two songs that have really spoken to me this week. One is by a group called Echoing Angels and the other one is by BarlowGirl. They kind of hit where I'm at right now.

Coming Back To Life
I take a breath and I’m alive
Feels like for the first time
I have seen You through these eyes.
Everything I used to be
That lived inside of me Is gone, for the last time.
I remember everything I’ve done
But You’ve forgiven each and everyone

And I’m coming back to life
I’m living inside
All of my fears are far behind
I’m coming back to life
I found what I need
And it’s You Lord I know that it’s
You That brings me back to life

I’ve searched the world just for a sign
Hoping I could find someone
Who could change a heart like mine
I read the stories of your life
The miracles and signs
You turned my water into wine.
It’s so much easier knowing you are hear
And all the doubts at once seem to disappear
My feet are dancing
My heart is crying out for you
So take my life I’m giving it to you

I Need You To Love Me
Why, why are You still here with me Didn't You see what I've done? In my shame I want to run and hide myself But it's here I see the truth I don't deserve You

[Chorus:]But I need You to love me, and I I won't keep my heart from You this time And I'll stop this pretending that I can Somehow deserve what I already have I need You to love me

I, I have wasted so much time Pushing You away from me I just never saw how You could cherish me 'Cause You're a God who has all things And still You want me Your love makes me forget what I have been Your love makes me see who I really am Your love makes me forget what I have been

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new. 2 Corinthians 5:17

Things aren't really easy, but they're being reconstructed and made new.